By Carrie Willey, PhD, LPC (Clinical Director) Pia Mellody has written extensively about Induced Feelings or Carried Feelings. This is the feeling energy that is absorbed by children in a dysfunctional family. When the parents or the Major Caregivers are unwilling to own or unconscious about their feelings, the children take that energy on. For example, if a mother rages, spewing anger all around, the child, because he/she is egocentric, believes that energy truly belongs to him/her and it is stored in the cellular memory of the body. If the caregiver is willing to take ownership, for example, the mother explains to the child that she is angry about a situation, but it has nothing to do with the child, then the child does not have to take on that energy. If a parent is critical, physically abusive or shaming of a child, the child will take on the energy of shame. If the father were to talk to the child about his/her behavior rather than attacking the child’s being, then the child has a choice about taking on the energy of shame. For example, if the father could tell the child that the behavior they have needs to be changed and it has nothing to do with a child’s worth or value, then the child would be less likely to take on the energy of shame. All too often, however, a child is told that they are a nuisance, bother, unacceptable, stupid, in-the-way, an idiot or unworthy. Having worked in […]
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